Tapestry

The first two movements of Tapestry were co-commissioned by Vancouver Chamber Choir – Kari Turunen, Artistic Director; The Elora Singers – Mark Vuorinen, Artistic Director; and Pro Coro Canada – Michael Zaugg, Artistic Director; with assistance from the SOCAN Foundation.

Movements 3 & 4 commissioned and premiered by Halifax Camerata Singers – Jeff Joudrey, Artistic Director – for their 35^th Anniversary Season, 2021-22.

Composer’s Notes

This work, all based on poems by Canadian poet Jeni Couzyn, follows a trajectory of:
1. Seeking/searching
2. Struggle
3. Affirmation (Warrior)
4. Arrival/Peace/Love

1. A speck in the cosmos, beholding the cosmos
This text expresses the vision that we are all one with everything in the universe. This poem communicates to me a sense of searching/seeking/aspiring – it reminds me of the feeling I have in trying to meditate. In my correspondence with poet Jeni Couzyn, she writes: “I am always trying to find ways of expressing my vision that we are made of particles and that the atoms, protons and electrons all spinning in infinitely tiny space, reflect the universe, with all its galaxies and star systems. This whole, this inner and outer map of spinning matter, space and relationship is what we are. Our bodies are cells of our planet, and our planet is a cell of our galaxy which is itself a cell of the universe which is the body and being of what we stretch to touch with our minds when we try to think of “God” The stanzas of the poem also refer to the experience of being stone, vegetation, animal/bird, and human. Reflection (in the first stanza) is one of the greatest mysteries of creation. Receptivity/giving is one of the wonders of plants. Free will is move and do an astonishing attribute of animals and birds, and of course to be a speck that beholds the whole is the almost unbearable task of being human.”

2. Remembering Angels
This movement explores how sacredness and beauty are all around us, we are swimming in it and flowing with it constantly, but we miss it all the time; as though the sacred should be so obvious and accessible, but we just carry on through our lives without seeing it. Yet, we can recognize it, even once in a lifetime. I feel in this text a sense of recognition, but also a frustration in falling short of our aspiration to connect with that sacredness. I also feel the magnitude of that blissful moment of recognition.

3. Warrior
This movement is a passionate, visceral outpouring of self-affirmation. I first read this text in the spring of 2020, and it struck a powerful chord in me and still does. The existential and ontological anxieties throughout our society increased exponentially throughout and beyond the pandemic years, and so many people are questioning themselves in new and incredibly challenging ways. As we grapple with our own self-questioning, I think it’s important that we also treat ourselves honourably, respectfully, and gently. In treating ourselves this way, we can extend this treatment to others and I believe this is how evolve as individuals and as a human race. As Jeni Couzyn wrote to me, “however many times we fail our own aspirations, we are not “gatecrashers at this party”. We are part of the process.” This poem was a timely reminder for me that in all this turmoil and amidst all our shortcomings and struggles, it’s important to remember the inherent good in us – every person, in their glorious imperfection, has value, is important, is deserving of love. When we really TRULY know this about ourselves (“No one on earth needs to hear this, or agree, or needs to endorse it), we know it about others too, and we connect to our universal ‘one-ness’:

Gazing outward at you from my centre
I see galaxies. The light waves travel
outward through time. The sound waves travel
looping and winding harmonies in
indelible singing.

In many ways for me, the work of the warrior is about this. I stand by my life.

4. Around you I turn
In this movement we arrive, finally, at acceptance and inner peace. Here is the moment of realizing that our inner light is always there – it’s not something we seek and find – it just is there for us to realize, and when we do we are whole and at peace. Often one has a shifting and dynamic relationship with this realization, and we can also feel accepting and peaceful about the shifting, knowing that divinity/sacredness/the Source – whatever you want to call it – is constant within us. In my correspondence with Jeni, she adds: “Yes, and add the ingredient of love. I think that love is the gravity that holds the substance of life together, stops it spinning apart into chaos. Love for the earth, for “God”, for a beloved human being, for life itself.”